When carrots just don't seem to fill that void of wanting more

You know, I really and truly love carrots.  Really.  I buy big bags of baby carrots every week at the store.  But, golly gee whiz...I work next door to a grease pit that sells hamburgers and french fries and think "Gosh, that smells good and is way over priced butttttt...I really want to have it."  And mind you, this place really isn't all that great.  It's the smell of grease that's intoxicating.  The smell of the bacon that is quite alluring.  You know, kind of like that Taco Bell commercial where the chick is totally carrying around a bacon chalupa and the dudes are hot for her (or the allure of bacon).

Now, I have a very, very, very serious question.  Whenever a tragedy of some sort happens, say like, an earthquake, how do officials come up with the numbers of how many people are dead, and how many are missing?  Take today for instance.  There was a landslide in Mexico.  8 people are dead.  100 are missing.  That's a pretty exact number, don't you think?  I know that the news people can be a bit redonk when handing down numbers of victims/casualties.  I realize that sometimes that those numbers are exaggerated.  But at least make it believable.  So, instead of EXACTLY 100 people missing, say 97.  Ohhhh what do I know about news reporting....

Funny, but true story.  Recently, one of my residents went on a cruise with his lady friend and another couple went along with them. When asked if he enjoyed his trip, he replied "I did, up until I lost my pants!"  Not knowing how to respond but with a hearty laugh, he explained further "It wasn't in J's stuff (his lady friend).  So, I must have lost it in M's room. (another lady)"  Weird.  Not sure if I want to know HOW the pair of pants ended up in M's room, but hey...sounds like he had a good time regardless! :) WHAT??? You think 88 year olds can't have a good time??  Sheesh!

So, ummm, hey...I need help.  I am so freaking popular that I have been invited to two different Halloween parties.  Thankfully, they are on separate nights.  But, I still need an idea for costumes.  HELP!

Leaving work, I saw three squirrels playing around an oak tree in the back parking lot.  It immediately took me back in time to the 4th grade and our teacher trying in VAIN to teach us what a prepositional phrase is.  Her example to us was "A squirrel just __________________ a tree."  (i.e. ran behind, beside, up, down, etc...)  Not sure WHY that popped in my head.

SO!  What have we learned here today: Bacon is alluring, 88 year olds have fun, I need costume ideas, squirrels are a great way to think about the 4th grade.

Until next time, I shall remain
static clingy